Date nite

So my boo and I don't get to spend much time together anymore :/. So I'm doing this long distant relationship thing. (thats another blog for another day) I didn't want his trip back to just be about us catching up on sex. I wanted to spend some time with him, I wanted to do something and or maybe go somewhere. I decided we should have a date night. I had lots of ideas....but this one was sexy!!!! Well at least I thought it was.

I picked up some really good food from his favorite restaurant and dessert!!! I grabbed a really good bottle of wine, some strawberries and chocolate. I got some "Silk" KY and some massage lotion. I put a sexy little (and I mean little) red lingerie and hott high heals on. I touched up my make-up and fluffed my hair. I was ready for a crazy, sexy, cool-date with my boo.

I headed to his house to surprise him with all my goodies AND....I get there and his ass was sleep. Not just sleep, but knocked out. He didn't hear the door bell or my knocks. I finally get in through the garage. I couldn't believe it, I thought he would be up and excited to see my naked ass (literally) serving him goodies. But, his response was pretty subdooed. I served him his food in my barely nothing get up drank the wine, ate a little food and went to sleep.

He seemed unphased by my efforts. I was more than disappointed in my (attempted) date night... FML!!!!

My Neighbor

The day I unloaded the UHaul truck, to move into my new house I met my neighbor. Well, actually we only spoke pleasantries. I never got his name and he never brought me the welcome to the neighborhood cake. We always waved in passing but never had more than 5 real words to each other. The basic... "Hey" "How are you?" "Beautiful day. Gonna wash your car?" "Have a good day." That lasted for almost 2 years.

I've since learned his name, that he met his wife in the DR, they have no children-only a really cute dog and that he works and then works out (I suppose he does have a nice body). But, had it not been for a short term house guest, I may have never learned that much. It seems my house guest and him became friendly during her stay. They would chat and hang out when I wasn't home. After finally being actually introduced, we would chat from across our yards. Every once in awhile, we would chat in one of our yards. I provide all this background to lead up to the issue...my neighbor likes me. No, he wants to sleep with me. His intentions are and would not be to court, date, chill, hang, or attempt to be with me-he just wants to fuck.

We've hung out twice. The 1st time was the (basic married man's/prep cheating) sob story about his marriage. Blah, blah, blah. I was ok with this very neighborly type hangout and felt that we could be cool. I figured everybody needs someone to talk to-a friend, when you need to talk , vent or cry. HOWEVER, the in passings became..."we should hang out" (wink, wink), comments about my boyfriend's car(s) ("still rolling with him and not me huh?"), comments about me, "Damn, you looking good today" and questions, "When you gonna let me 'take care of you'". I ignored the inappropriateness and just charged it to a man flirting. But the 2nd time we hung out (over drinks) it was a full blown conversation about what he wanted to do to me-How he wanted to beat it and eat it up. WOW Neighbor!?!?

Now, don't get me wrong. I liked the every once in a while flirty comments...the you look cute today" ones-it's good for my ego. I didn't mind being a friend/a shoulder when he was whinning about his cheating wife. And the beat it eat it conversation was interesting, but, I wasn't and am absolutely not interested. Which got me to thinking.... Do you really have sex with your married neighbor?!?! I mean everything about that is very wrong and very bad!!! He's married! The sex could be good or bad (for me or for him), either way the ramifications of either couldn't be good. The possibiloities of that bullshit would be endless.

I've since...stopped landscapping my yard...I get Juan to do that. I don't take out my trash...I get my son to do that and I only leave the house when it's dark. Because at the end of the day. I don't want my house burnt down.

On to the Next One

How long should a person take to move onto their next relationship? Does it depend on how long the previous relationship lasted? Does it matter if you were just boyfriend/girlfriend or married? If you rush into the next relationship quickly does it mean that the previous relationship was less significant than one may have thought?

Whatever the answer, I definitely think finding and loving yourself again is critical. Additionally, carrying baggage into the next relationship isn't so good either. So, is a slow process with little to no communication better or easier? Or abrupt and done? Which ever, pace is important and we all have to do it on our own time.

So where to start? What's the approach? Maybe some "Me" time, for reflection and realization? Or drowning yourself into workout plans and work? Hmmmmm, maybe catch up with girlfriends that were neglected during the course of the relationship. Or catch up at old lounges/bars that were avoided during the relationship.

I have a friend that says "New sex, helps you forget about the old sex" And another says "Lots of new sex will get you an STD" LOL. Point made and taken, however...what happens on those lonely nights when you're alone and you have been for months and the sex just doesn't help anymore? When the girl friends go home to their boyfriends after all the catching up is done? What happens when the bars are closed? Or what if you guys were really good friends? Does your ex become your next?

Well, I'm no relationship expert and could or would not ever tell anyone how to move on to the next. I just know that on this ride of life and love the next ride should always be better than the one before!!!

His Friend?!

Women know when their husband's or boyfriend's friends like and flirt with us. And we also know if and when we give it attention. So is it ok that after you've broken up that you can then hang out, like and flirt back with him. And do you tell your ex? Do you get or need his approval? Do you or can you have sex with him and or possibly consider marriage? And what if you and your ex get back together after said relationship occured. Is that weird? Is it wrong and do you at any point ever tell your ex? And who is or was the aggressor when the circumstances were presented?

I've been in, know some of my girls have been in and a couple of my girls are in such situations....So let's explore this.....

-Flirting back and then hanging out-> I think ok, but ONLY, after the relationship is over and as long as you don't have sex with the friend!
-Having sex with the friend-> Never tell the EX! Just NEVER have sex with the friend hmmm or maybe the EX again.
-Having sex and then deciding to marry the friend-> I think a REAL conversation is in order!!! But don't have sex with the EX again. LOL.

DAMN his sexy friends!!! Why wasn't it his friend before it was him? But HMMM, would it just be the same thing but the Ex was the FRIEND????

LMAO!!!

I love men....

It's something about a tall dark chocolate BALD man that gets my juices flowing. I love rubbing his head and in our most intimate moments together, kissing it so softly that it does something for us both. And the cutie batootie light skin babes with the tight beijing fades-it wasn't just the 80's. Then there's those muy caliente dread men, that make me take a double take. I love grabbing them like reins and making him submit to my needs. When they lightly graze my back drives me crazy!!! And oh my, the swag of those bad boy tattooed Latino boys. EYYYYYYY Papi. He can talk all the shit he wants in Spanish as long as it ends in mi amor!!! And I won't forget my clean cut sensual Brad Pitt look-a-like honeys. They seem to be so passionate. But I bet behind closed doors, we're making movies.

Don't get me wrong, the hard working nice athletic build and muscular body type is pretty hott too. They look like they put in work. I visualize them fixing ANYTHING broken in my house. Oh, minus the butt crack. And then the sexy Athletes...football, basketball, baseball men....TOUCH DOWN!!!!! And only if Tiger knew *growl*.

And when a man loves a woman...Chivalry is not dead! The compassion, romance, the want and need to protect, support, provide and build a life with you is an amazing thing. He tells you daily how much he loves you and is in love with, how beautiful you are, how much he needs and wants you. He doesn't wait for a holiday to express his love. He respects, trust and communicates with you. He commits to you and only you...

And then I woke up

DAMN DREAMS

Hospital Doctors

So, last week I had to take my children to the ER. I've gone to the same hospital for the past 17 years no matter how far I've lived from it. My thought process is, ALL our records are there, I know the Dooctors, Going to another Hospital and then providing all my information again is a pain, not knowing the Doctors at another hospital is uncomfortable, having to only follow up with my primary physcian at that hospital later is so much more convenient. So, that's where I go and that's where I'll stay.

A good freind of mine was able to accompany me. So as we sat and waited for registration and triage several very good looking Doctors walked by, smiled and spoke pleasantries. After about the 5th or 6th Doctor, my friend says. "There are some very attractive Doctors here, I don't think I've ever seen this many good looking Doctors ever at 1 time. Is that why you come here?" I quickly responded "no" and provided her with my now practiced answer for the past 17 years.... But much later as I sat and listened to the very good smelling, good looking, bed-room eyes having, athletically built, perfect teeth, seductive smile, charming and educated orthopedic surgeon it hit me-did I really continue to come to this hospital to get my eye candy fix? Was and has it been a subconcious behavior. It had never occured to me that it may infact not been my previous reasons, but possibly because of the very good looking Doctors. They were and are always very handsome. Thinking further, I also never went to the ER in sweats and sneakers, but heels, cute jeans and lip gloss applied.

Well gotta go, the kids have their follow up appointments this afternoon.